Heart on Fire

It never arrives as I anticipate it will. It comes up slowly, then swallows me all at once — It’s been this way for as long as I can remember. Both a blessing and a curse to be connected to your own heart with a profound depth. To hold a certain attentive love while simultaneously holding a quiet strength to dig deep into your own heart at any given moment. To be consumed by a mind of thoughts and secrecy. To grasp the beauty of it all in your hands and count ten, twenty, thirty thousand reasons to live this life and touch each moment with more pleasure than the last. Do you seize the fire in your heart or throw yourself in it? Is there a place for anyone who does not rival death with a certain fierceness? It took me some time to find my way, but here I am; alive, here, breathing. Alive. Inhale, hold for six, exhale, hold for six. Throw yourself into the flames, move your gentle body toward the ocean. The more I open myself, the more I push myself beyond dissolvable boundaries. The more life seeps through the cracks and I am carried away; emerging, disappearing, emerging further. Permanence echoes and repeats itself. Do not let the poison in, do not let this world turn your heart to stone. Keep the flame alight. The world will put its mouth on you, and you will kiss it back through love and through death.

Beloved Body

Do not be afraid to disappear. For a while. From it. From us. To see how you unfold in the silence. To see how the fires of your own love lay dormant and hold you. This fire in your body allows you to breathe and access inner sensations felt to the core. Felt profoundly in the landscape of your body — Like a sweetness that pierces straight through the skin. It is fluid, formless, buried beneath the bones. It is what forces the body to lay down against the ice, it is what drowns out the chaos and clutter of the world, it is what happens between heartbeats and it is up to you to hold the discovery of yourself tightly in your own hands.